This is the start of my series based on song lyrics. Song: Rainy Days and Mondays. Lyrics by Paul Williams. Music by Roger Nichols. On the album Carpenters by the Carpenters, 1971.
“Rainy Days and Mondays” by the Carpenters is the most honest song I know. It tells the story of the view from within a depressed person. I can always listen to this song and feel at home. I know what it’s like. A lifetime of depression teaches one way too much. I’m not providing psychological advice here, just a point-of-view.
When you are depressed you often feel like shutting down and hibernating to feel better. Removing stimuli feels comfortable. Many people with depression just want to be left alone. I have done this to the point of becoming a hermit. As the song says, there is not one thing that you can do but cry, frown, or sleep. It’s a restless feeling. It’s a lonely feeling. It’s a hopeless feeling.
You have this thing called depression hanging over you. You know that something is wrong, but you feel like you are living a different life. When I feel like that, I feel out of place. Where do I belong? I don’t feel like I belong in the land of the living. I feel like I’m between this world and the next. It is not a nice feeling, but you can’t control it.
When depression comes again, it feels like it is the same old story. After a while, you wonder if it is a never ending cycle. Others start to wonder why you are withdrawn. You wonder if it will ever end. You grow away from other people. You grow in toward yourself. You can’t reach out after a time. It is lonely. Ever lonely.
There are many aspects to depression. We all feel it differently. One song above them all is so very true for most of us. Depression is a real illness that needs to be taken as seriously as cancer or heart disease. Unfortunately our society believes it should be up to individual practitioners to help people. It doesn’t work. We need a solid mental healthcare system. Right now we have no system.